Spring Semester

Everyones home here at the finlandia family. Sarah Maci and I have caught up and I attempted to go cross country sking and surprisingly enjoyed every minute of it. I am so thankful for the blessings the Lord has given me here even though I struggle he brings me back.  For His faithfulness I am eternally grateful :) There are so many things in this I can not understand and I suppose that is why we are called to trust Him.

Looking forward to this semester and getting to know God better :) 

Ramble Ramble

Sometimes I get so discouraged by what others think, and I contemplate why aren't I good enough for these people? The comfort I find in the Lord that I don't HAVE to be anything anyone wants me to be, I just need to be glorifying to God. With this fact, that he loves me just the same either way, I think that's what makes me want to glorify him. I struggle so much with how I can please others, and when I don't it's heartbreaking but there's no possible way to please every person in my life, in conclusion I should focus on pleasing him who loves me in all circumstances :) so many things on my mind tonight, not looking forward to being at school, but thankful for the opportunity to be away from problems here. Saw him today and he just laughed at me. I'm thinking what's wrong with me? How could I have loved him so much and he thinks of me as a joke? He's changed so much, but I'm keeping him in my prayers. I miss who he was, not the person he's become, maybe one day things will be different. I don't know what to do or what's going to happen, trusting Him now with my life(as it should be)!

Realization

There are certain things I will never understand but for the most part I am content with life and how my wonderful my Savior is. I want to spend more time with getting, getting to know him better and living out is His word in my life. This sounds so easy but contrary it has been such a struggle in my Christian walk. My heart has been focused on so many different things lately rather than bringing him glory in every aspect of my life. For 2012, my resolution is to spend time in the word daily, and in prayer. I want to fall in love with Christ and the acts he's done for me. Rather than asking him for things, I want to thank him for all I have. I've been so swept up in why am I alone? what's wrong with me, when really I'm not mature enough in my relationship with Christ to have the type of relationship I need. Lord, I just pray for peace tomorrow, that you could calm me and help me to keep my mind set on you and things that are glorifying to you. I pray that I could cling to you and grow into the believer you wish me to be. I pray for your blessing on my decisions, and that you would just led me closer to you. I stray. I fail. I strive. I yearn.